


A Requiem For Love

by anunsungrequiem



Category: In the Heights - Miranda
Genre: Angst, Death, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Roller Coaster, F/F, F/M, Hanahaki Disease, Heavy Angst, Hospitals, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, M/M, Multi, Sad, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Unrequited Love, Why Did I Write This?, You Have Been Warned, as per usual, carla is a gay, comedy to numb the pain, everybody is cynical, pete deserves better, usnavi is a little shit
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-21
Updated: 2017-03-21
Packaged: 2018-10-08 18:22:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,115
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10393197
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anunsungrequiem/pseuds/anunsungrequiem
Summary: (A/N): I accidentally posted this earlier but it wasn't finished so now I finished it. Please leave feedback in the comments!





	

**Author's Note:**

> (A/N): I accidentally posted this earlier but it wasn't finished so now I finished it. Please leave feedback in the comments!

The flowers came in waves.

It all started as a small cough when Pete was painting, Sonny only a few feet behind watching. Pete wasn’t surprised at first; tagging a wall in a small, dusty alleyway would cause anyone to cough a bit. It wasn’t until later that Pete had concerns. Another coughing fit at home, longer this time. It was an overwhelming feeling, for a while Pete felt as though he was suffocating; although suffocation may have been better. Only a few minutes later Pete coughed up a petal, small and delicate.

Yet faded.

At this point Pete was scared beyond belief (as any other rational human would be if they had coughed up a fucking petal,) he  **had** heard stories of people coughing up flowers before, however they were mostly just rumors; tales that Daniela and Carla would tell to the little kids in the barrio. Hell, he had probably been told the same tales as a child, he just never paid any mind. Why would he? It was all fiction, thought alone seemed absurd, yet there Pete was, coughing up small petals.

Pete was high, he  **wanted** to be high, this couldn’t be happening. He may not have been the smartest person, he certainly wasn’t anywhere close to being Nina Rosario, but he knew damn well that this wasn’t meant to be possible. Pete put his thoughts aside him and shut his eyes tight, lying down on his ripped up old couch. For the first time in his life he prayed, he prayed this was all some crazy nightmare, he prayed he was just high. He didn’t want this to be real, he didn't know what he would do if this was real.

The night was a chaotic one, filled with Pete tossing and turning and coughing. He coughed until his throat hurt, the darkness seemed to take forever to fade, by the time the sunlight was spilling in through his blinds Pete swore he coughing up blood as well. It only took him a few moments there was no way he could avoid the day, he was going to have to get up sooner or later even if it was just to use the bathroom. Hesitantly Pete opened his eyes, only to see that he was surrounded by petals of all sizes. That’s when Pete was hit with the truth. This was all real, he wasn’t high and he certainly wasn’t dreaming. This was far too scary, far too painful to be anything but reality.

Pete didn’t want to get out of bed, he wanted to curl up on his couch and hide for hours, he wanted to scream and cry, but what was the point? He knew, at the end of the day screaming and crying wouldn’t help, nothing would. He had no choice but to continue life as though it were a normal day for him. As long as nobody saw what he was coughing up, nobody had any clue that he was anything but normal, for all they knew Pete could just be getting severe asthma due to inhaling fumes from spray paint. As long as Pete could stay quiet, nobody needed to know.

Eventually Pete got off of his shitty couch, getting dressed in his shitty clothes, and leaving his shitty apartment. Only one thing had changed about his schedule, he filled his pockets with tissues. He was “Graffiti” Pete, he was tough, nobody would ask about a little cough, and as long as nobody asked he wouldn’t tell. Nobody really cared about him, he was nothing more than the neighborhood vandal, the one people told their kids about, he was the failure that nobody ever wanted to be; if the people in the barrio  **did** have an opinion on him they probably thought of him as a nuisance, nothing more, nothing less.

Well, everyone except Sonny De La Vega.

Sonny had been his best friend since what felt like forever, some of Pete’s earliest memories were of the days he spent with Sonny talking, laughing, and drawing. The days before Pete became a vandal, the days before Sonny was a social activist, the days before they began to grow up.  The winters where they would stay in the bodega covered with blankets while they drank hot chocolate. The endless summers where Sonny would talk about articles that he read in the newspaper while Pete drew on the sidewalk with sidewalk chalk. Eventually though their endless summers had to come to an end.

Their childhood may have felt like forever when they were living it, however looking back on it, it seemed like their childhood had passed by in a matter of seconds. The summer days where  Pete drew on the sidewalks while he listened to Sonny rambling about newspaper articles turned into days where Pete would tag the grate only to be chased away by Usnavi minutes later, the winters turned into cold storms where Pete would come in to the bodega to greet Sonny only to hear Usnavi threatening to call the cops. Being a teenager was complicated and most times Sonny would have to sneak past Usnavi in order to hang out with Pete for even a few minutes; times were tough on the entire barrio, but things only went even further downhill for Sonny and Pete.

Pete was 16 when he began to question his sexuality, he never told a soul, besides Sonny that is. He always confided in Sonny, and Sonny always confided in him, they had promised to never judge each other when it came to things like this, and they both kept to their word.

_ “Hey Son, can I just be real for a second? No jokes, none of that.” _

_ “Yeah sure Petey, what’s up?” _

_ “I think I might be bi, or not straight at least.” _

_ “Okay cool, you’re still my best friend Pete ‘n I wouldn’t want it any other way.” _

Pete being bisexual was never a huge issue, he had a lot of girlfriends, a few boyfriends here and there, everything was fine. Then Pete started to develop feelings for Sonny; correction, he didn’t develop feelings for Sonny, his feelings for Sonny simply evolved. The platonic adoration grew into something stronger, it grew into love. The little future president and artist had grown up, their feelings had grown up as well. What was once simply happiness became excitement, joy, and euphoria. It became painful for Pete to hide these feelings, he wanted to tell Sonny but he didn’t want to run the risk of ruining their friendship. “Don’t wait too long you might miss your chance,” is what Benny always told Usnavi when he was hesitant about confessing his feelings, Pete of course never listened to a word of advice. He obviously waited far too long, because one day Sonny must have simply gotten tired of waiting.

_ “Pete you know that guy in chem I was talking about?” _

_ “Yeah, Connor his name was, right? _

_ “Yeah, well we’ve actually been dating for a while.” _

_ “Oh.” _

_ “I’m thinkin’ of introducing him to ‘Snavi, I really love him Pete.” _

Flowers faded, love faded, all far too quickly; each summer had to end and each winter had to come. Life and death were always present, and they all came without warning. Pete was stuck; stuck in the barrio, stuck loving somebody that would never love him, and he was stuck living in a  fantasy, living in that endless summer that had already come to an end long ago. Abuela Claudia had always told Pete and Sonny “ Al mal tiempo, buena cara,” but how could you be positive when you were the victim of unrequited love?

Pete’s thoughts were interrupted by another coughing fit, he pulled tissue out of his pocket as quickly as he could, covering his mouth. Nobody could find out, rumors spread around the barrio like a wildfire, and the last thing that Pete needed was attention now. The suffocating feeling came and went, the coughing came to a halt, however it didn’t leave without making sure Pete’s throat stung like hell. Pete walked down the familiar streets, head low, trying to avoid making any eye contact. He took a sharp left by the De La Vega’s bodega, rushing past, hoping Sonny didn’t see. He had one place that he needed to be right now, the salon.

Pete stepped into the salon hesitantly, the scent of hairspray and nail polish surrounding him almost instantly. Earlier he would have felt as though he was suffocating do to the large amounts of products used by the owners Carla and Daniela, however nothing could compare to the feeling he got during his coughing fits, nothing could be that hellish. Obviously Pete had been drifting off into his thoughts because now everyone was staring at him, including Carla and Daniela.

“Dani, it’s Pete, he’s actually here, what do we do?” Carla asked, her voice was obviously intended to be a whisper, which was made obvious by Daniela hitting her arm afterwards. Daniela and Carla had owned that salon for ages, Pete and Sonny both went there as kids for free haircuts, when he became a teenager Pete had stopped so suddenly, he wasn’t surprised by Carla’s and Daniela’s shock. The last time that the two had seen him was probably at Claudia’s service. He didn’t realize how much he had truly isolated himself until now.

“I’m here for a haircut, that’s it.” Pete answered, trying his best to seem calm. Pete wasn’t Albert Einstein, but he had common sense; if he just walked into the salon and started asking about a fairytale that he had been told as a kid he would seem insane, even that was an understatement. He just needed to find a way to slip the topic into conversation, which would be much harder than it sounded.

Daniela and Carla both loved talking, if you needed to hear gossip the salon was the place to go, but if he had learned anything from his years at the salon it was that you  **always** needed to watch your mouth. If you had Carla you would probably have no issue, Carla wasn’t necessarily stupid, in fact she was probably just as smart as Pete, however unlike Daniela she didn’t analyze every single word that you said. Daniela scared Pete as a child if he was being completely honest, she had a way of getting the truth out of people that could intimidate even the best lawyers. If he had to watch out for anyone now, it was Daniela.

“Mhm, siéntate, la silla en la parte de atrás también.” Daniela replied, rolling her eyes before going back to her customer’s hair. Pete would be lying if he said he didn’t smile when he heard Daniela say this; the chair in the back was the broken chair that she had people sit in if she was angry at them. It was nice knowing that Daniela’s attitude hadn’t changed, it would seem like the  end of the world if it did. “The chair in the back? That’s cold even for you Dani.” Pete laughed slightly before taking his seat in the back, observing the barbicide on the counter while he did so.

“Don’t you ‘Dani’ me Alvarez, serves you right for avoiding me all of these years, now shut up and let me work.” Daniela shot back. Even though Pete couldn’t see her face he could tell she was smiling. A rope constricting his chest, his lungs filling with what felt like dirt and ashes, forcing him to fall victim to a loud and painful coughing fit again. Pete’s throat felt like it was on fire, and he could do nothing about it but cover his mouth with a tissue in hopes that nobody would notice what was wrong. He could lie and talk circles around people as much as possible, but once somebody had physical evidence the jig was up.

The coughing fit was longer this time, Pete genuinely felt unable to breath, his tissue was filling up quickly, pastel covered flower petals were visible through the tissue at this point. He was completely helpless, until it all came to a stop. The coughing subdued suddenly, Pete certainly wasn’t expecting it, in fact he was frozen in shock for a moment before realizing what had just happened. As soon as he became aware of his surroundings again he threw his tissue into the garbage can right under the counter. He knew he had brought attention to himself, but he was unsure of how much attention.

Ater Daniela finished cashier duty with her two customers she walked to Pete’s seat looking at him in the mirror. “Look at you, you’re sick  **and** your shave is uneven. Mijo, who does your hair? You know what I don’t want to know, I don’t need to be arrested for murder today.” The joke managed to get a small genuine chuckle out of Pete, which was met with Daniela lightly hitting his arm with a comb. “Ay, you can act as tough as you want but you’re always going to be acting, I know you.” Daniela snorted, putting down the comb and picking up the electric razor. Pete had missed this; being close with the community, in truth the barrio was like a family, as dysfunctional as that family was at times.

People always said time went by quickly when you were having fun, and Pete would be the first to admit they were right. His haircut seemed to be over as soon as it started, while this may have been due in part to him being practically bald, it was also due to him being able to relax and just talk to Carla and Daniela. His memory was already slightly jumbled but he remembered a few important strands of information, such as Carla and Daniela officially being a couple, and Usnavi having met Connor on multiple occasions.

The feeling of suffocation, this time it wasn’t caused by the petals filling  his chest, but instead it was caused by guilt. Pete was jealous of Connor, he was jealous of how Connor could be happy with Sonny, he was jealous of how Connor was practically a member of the barrio in just a matter of weeks when Pete had spent his entire life trying to fit in until he gave up. Jealousy was a sin, however that wasn’t why Pete felt guilty, he felt guilty because he should have been happy for Sonny.

Sonny found a boy that he loved, a boy that Usnavi approved of, a boy that didn’t wait in fear of screwing things up. Sonny deserved happiness, and that was exactly why Pete had no intention of confessing his emotions to Sonny, that is why Pete wouldn’t let Sonny find out about his illness until he was incapable of hiding the truth. Sonny De La Vega deserved happiness, and who was Pete to interfere? He was nothing more than a vandal who was hopelessly in love with his best friend.

“Dani, I’ve been meanin’ to ask, remember that shitty myth that you always told the kids during the summer, the one ‘bout the coughin’ up flowers and shit?” Pete asked, trying his best to feign calmness; it was hard enough being the neighborhood crook, being the barrio’s crazy man would only make his life worse. There was a pause, for just a moment, a thick silence filling the room; it was s though time had stopped to pay attention to what was going to happen next. “I remember alright, what brings it up?” Pete had to fake a laugh, he didn’t know what else to do while he thought of a response, one managed to come to him, but he was unsure of whether or not it would work.

“I’ve got a cough, just brought back good memories and shit I ‘spose.” Pete lied, what else was he meant to do? He wasn’t about to stand up from his seat and start explaining to Daniela how he started coughing up flower petals. Pete hated lying to people, he was a bad liar, he just hoped Daniela wouldn’t notice. At this point he had no other options, he was going to keep this a secret, no matter how much he had to lie or who he had to lie to. Besides this was good practice, the only person that knew Pete better than Daniela was Sonny, and Pete didn’t know how he would summon the strength to lie to Sonny.

“That’s one hell of a nasty cough Alvarez, promise me you’ll get that checked out or at least some NyQuil from the bodega.” Daniela started slowly, this side of her rarely came out. Daniela came off as cold to many people, usually Carla was the one worrying about other people openly, Pete just shrugged it off and decided that Carla’s bubbly personality was finally getting to Daniela. “It was called Hanahaki disease, basically the sufferer coughs and throws up flowers when they fall in love with somebody who doesn’t share their feelings. Nasty disease, my mother told me all about it growing up in Vega Alta, swore that’s what her mother died from, it’s just a schoolyard legend, I’m surprised you remembered it at all.”

Pete  **_did_ ** forget though; the only reason he remembered anything about the myth at all was because of what had happened in the past few weeks. Pete was a victim of unrequited love, now he was coughing up petals as well, not just any petals either. Flower petals, on the verge of death, their colors faded beyond compared. Times go by, plans go stale, flowers die, and so does love, that was simply what had happened in this case.

“Eh, memories are fuckin’ crazy like that sometimes,” Pete started as he got up from the chair looking at his reflection in the mirror. He looked pale, ghastly almost, he wondered how long he had looked that way. Daniela had probably noticed, but decided against saying anything; it was not like she was about to get a ton of gossip from an illness. “How much do I owe you?”

“It’s on the house, just don’t tell anyone or I will not hesitate to kill you.” daniela joked, leading Pete to the door. It was like they were old friends, meeting for the first time in years, becoming closer than ever before. Pete began to walk out of the salon, pausing when Daniela spoke up again. “Also, Alvarez, mind your fucking language mijo.” Pete looked back, simply flashing a small smile at Daniela before walking out without a clue as to what he would do next.

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> *In this fic I headcanon Pete's last name as Alvarez because it suits him, in my opinion at least.
> 
> Mijo- Son (this is meant in an endearing manner, Pete and Daniela are not related)  
> Siéntate, la silla en la parte de atrás también- Sit, the chair in the back too.


End file.
